To say I’m a “people person” is to put it….uh, lightly. I loooove them. In all shapes and sizes and forms and personalities. I depend on them: my husband, my kids, my friends, my mentors, my coaches. If I have a question or a problem or am happy about something, my first instinct is to reach out and share. Connect. Get advice. As one of my daughters likes to say, “More people, more power.”

But I’ve recently found that with some things, you reach a point where you have to go it alone. I’ve been studying and riding my horse countless hours for an upcoming test. As much as possible, I have coerced, charmed and threatened friends and coaches into riding with me and listening to my concerns. I’ve had countless texts with my trainer and mentor about certain technical aspects of the ride.


But as I approach go-time, it has hit me like a ton of bricks that the only one taking this test is me. The hours of riding this week leading up to it are mine – no one can fix what’s broken except me. No one can calm me down but me. No one is responsible for walking into the arena, getting on the horse, and taking this test except me.


I never underestimate the power of crowd-sourcing when chasing a dream. There are so many people who are a heck of a lot smarter and more experienced than I am who can help. But why do I have a hard time letting go of this dependence on others?


I did a little soul searching over the last week and realized that it boils down to a lack of belief in my abilities, my preparation, and myself. I’m asking questions I already know the answers to. I’m asking for company while riding when I need to be focused on executing. I’m asking for reassurance about things that I’ve already I’m confident about (my poor, poor husband…). I’m doubting my hundreds of hours of work.


A dear friend recently said, “Some say it takes courage to dream big. While there may be some truth to that, there’s no courage if we never pursue them. There comes a point in time where we must put our head down and execute. Yes we’ll experience rejection. Yes we’ll have to confront our fears. But it’s in these moments where we have the opportunity to display true courage. The type of courage that puts us in a position to become the model for other’s thoughts and actions…one of the purest and most authentic forms of leadership there is.” – Blake Cavignac


Are you pursuing a dream that scares you? An athletic feat? A career change? Having children? A challenging hobby? Something that makes you quake a little inside? If so, congratulations. You’ve already made the first step to living the good life. Put your head down and put in the work. And when the time arrives to execute, make the choice to:

Believe in that dream.

Believe in your preparation.

Believe in your ability.

Believe in yourself.

Cliche’? Maybe. Truth? Most definitely.

I’m at that place right now, and I’m afraid to fail; I’m not going to lie. But it’s time to stop looking to others to hold me up and allow the hours of preparation and work speak for themselves. It’s time to let go of the result, put my body in the saddle, and have some fun.